Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Can it be 2014 now?

If it were at all possible, I'd like to choose to just skip through this year and let all the things that are coming just happen without nary a moment more spent on them.

That's right, as if enough people weren't already happy enough to say sionara to 2012, the way this 2013 is starting, I think it's just better if we all get cast under someone's sleep spell right now so that when the bell tolls midnight on December 31st we can all just wake up refreshed and ready to greet a happy 2014, without even having acknowledged the presence of 2013.

Since January 1st, my mother in law has wrapped up her chemo but is still suffering side affects and depression and a financial hardship has befallen them because of the travelling they put into getting back and forth to her treatments.  My friend's mother in law, whom we really have enjoyed being around, has been handed a death sentence with a diagnosis of pancreatic and liver cancers, and it's all too likely that she won't make it til the end of the year.  My own mother has been having health troubles from start to finish, and we are now awaiting her diagnosis of well, just about anything you can swag your stick at - though in all likelihood it's looking like lung cancer and rheumatoid arthritis...if we're lucky.  Another friend's father has passed away, and another friend is facing debilitating effects of her own terminal illness...our own health has been plagued by the nasty viruses that knock us on our butts, and our own financial situation has become about as dire as it could get without sending us into bankruptcy...

So, it's all up hill from here right and this is all just a part of life?  One can bloody well hope so.  And while yes it is all a part of life, it all bloody well stinks.  Finding a silver lining is increasingly difficult, which is playing upon my own emotional stability.  The only one I've found so far is that finally my husband has recognized the state of our finances and is now ready to work on them with me.  Fighting that battle when your partner is busy sabotaging every effort is pretty well impossible, and leaves me with no confusion as to why my mental health has been so challenged the last year.  When every word out of your mouth seems to resonate like the words coming out of Charlie Brown's teacher, you start to question if you're actually the problem or not.


Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?  God I hope so.  Cuz if not, then there's truth to the old saying "life sucks and then you die".  I'd really hate to adopt that as my philosophy...

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