I've never been one to set New Year's Resolutions, because the reality is, they never stick. I don't know a single person who sets a New Year's Resolution and keeps it for the long haul. And I think the selection of a new calendar year as the catalyst for significant personal growth is too arbitrary and artificial and thereby sets us up for failure.
I believe we have our own internal clocks that work off our own biorhythms that tell us when change is needed. When course correction is critical and beneficial to our well being our bodies let us know, and often quite loudly. And if we listen to our bodies, and our minds, and our souls, we end up living the most optimal life we can live.
With the reflection I've done over the last 4 to 5 weeks and all of the hurdles I've braced, leaped and cleared, I can tell you that I have resolved to win my battle with weight loss once and for all, and I've determined that I'll do it on my own terms. Of course that means it's also coming at a heftier price tag, but in the end I hope well worth it.
I called last week and scheduled myself for Slimband surgery. I'll be having it done in early March. Coincidentally before my next consultation would have even occurred with the hospital staff for gastric bypass. I know that not everyone can afford to privately pursue this kind of surgery...I am barely scraping it together myself. But the truth of it is, a lot of the anxiety and depression and anger I was experiencing in December related to the treatment we received during that initial consultation, and even more to do with the fact that their only proposed solution was drastically more invasive, disruptive and painfully risky, than the one I originally wanted to begin with.
It's a crying shame that the only option OHIP will cover is vastly more expensive and painful and risky than a lap band. And their only other alternatives (unless of course you're in the military) are 12 week starvation plans and behavioural coaching. Really? We haven't come even slightly further out of the dark ages than to continue blaming the patient? It's saddening honestly.
So instead, I'll suck up 5 years worth of payments (and pay more due to the interest that will accrue) to be sure that I have something that gets me rebounding much more quickly, ensures I can eat normally if not dramatically less than I used to for the rest of my life, and which is then as permanent as I wish it to be. Then should I by chance get pregnant, I'm not introducing the potential that my fetus will be undernourished on top of all the other potential complication it may have. Then, I won't worry if I have a bite full of something my child's birthday cake, a piece of chocolate or anything slightly more fatty than a cucumber, that I'll have unyielding stomach cramps and "dumping". And when all is said and done, I've already been treated more respectfully and cordially than I have been through the entire OHIP sanctioned process.
I never expected the staff who is beholden to our government to administer these services to be bending over backwards for me. Truth be told, I don't even expect that from a private company who get paid megabucks to perform these surgeries. But I ALWAYS expect that people recognize my time is as golden as theirs. In every situation, my money is paying for this surgery - through OHIP or through private arrangements. I'm deeply saddened that this is costing me significantly more than it should.
And OHIP should be covering this type of surgery. It costs less to perform it, and costs significantly less to monitor and sustain it. And finally, the quicker the people who need it have recovered and are sustaining their weight loss, the lighter the cost impacts are in every other related medical area for that patient. Our healthcare system and the successes it boasts worldwide is a corner stone of our society. I'm truly baffled by how we've allowed this system to become so mismanaged. Maybe once McGuinty is replaced and his liberals are finally ousted, we'll find some degree of reform to the whole system, in particular where preventative procedures are expedited through coverage. Something here has got to change!